The Onli Me

What's wrong with me?

2007-11-25T04:26:00.000-08:00

Haiz....

I am very sorry to those who I have throw temper on recently...
Recently, I have very bad attitude, and I have been very emotionally instable, Sorry man... I am so sorry...

If there is any chance for me to do anything, let me know, I mean I am realli sorry for what I did.... Seriously....

I have serious moodswing, SO very very sorry.... And I am petty sry...
I mean If you realli know me, then you should know how I really sry sry sry... Haiz....

I think I really need to think back and take things more lightly i mean not to be so serious.
I am Sorry Chong LIMIN!!! realli dun mean it!!!

Trust me... I wouldn't act harshly le.... I won't say the things to hurt you again...
Cos I rem what you said... The one who loves you won't make you cry...

Learning how to cherish the past i had!

2007-11-08T04:56:00.000-08:00

Hello! Long time no chat liao... i mean Long time no post....
I learn to cherish the past at time, as at least I have the chance to meet that someone.
At least I have the chance to meet him in class, not everyone have the chance to meet anyone. As for my school's case it is very little chance to even meet someone. Being able to see him everyday(which is in the past) is enough, at least i have the chance.
Actually I am fortunate that i can know quite alot of things about him although some maybe lie but at least I still know things that others might not know. Actually I am quite fortunate to see quite alot of things. His gentle side/ his angry side/ his happy side.
And quite fortunate not everyboby can share individual time with the people they like... Therefore, not that bad afterall bah.... Furthermore, at least he use to pamper me and worry about me, and I think that's should be enough bah...
But recently i found out that he is a guy who will like to know new people expecially girls haiz...
Nvm bah... maybe his care and concern have already flew away.
I dun know if it is of any motive but just remember the happy moment bah....

JoLeNe TaN

ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-08-07T05:28:00.000-07:00

SHOCK TO SEE ME POST????
AR!!!!!!!!!
WHY NO ONE TELL ME WHY WHY WHY!!!!!!!
WHY AM I THE LAST ONE TO KNOW WHY WOR WHY?????????
:'(
PAIN PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHY NO ONE TELL ME
WHY................
I HAVE BEEN THE FOOL ALL ALONG....
:'(
JOLENE BAKA

What's on my mind?

2007-06-30T06:06:00.000-07:00

Ha...where should I start? ha ha... tell you all what happen today first bah... I went for my practical practice!!!!!! YEAH !!!
that was fun man!!!!
ha ha ha...
Guess which is the most funniest part???
ha ha... My sis got shock when she see me turn... as i didn't really release the acceleration pedal and turn... ha ha ha... Like DYTONA sia!!!! ha ha... Then the instructor got a shock... cos... I stop very near the vehicle infront ha ha ha!!!!! LALALA!!!!

Can anyone tell me what happen to me? Shouldn't I feel happy when he is close to me... Why can't i treat me like normal??? haiz....
what's on me... People view me i should be happi but why why...:'(
Why when i noe he no longer care i would feel the sadness why??
='(

I JUST WANNA BE WITH YOU RIGHT NOW!!!!

The EMO day!!!!

2007-06-28T08:43:00.000-07:00

To start off....
Wanted to post something i wrote at BBDC while thinking of him during my practice paper.
(The eye for him)
" If possible of course I would want to be by your side. But if fate is to be so cruel or rather i dun realli know how to phrase it, I would just hide behind something or someone to watch you sliently. To make sure that everything is going well for you. If you sentence me to death without a reason, I would not stop you. Course without you to look out for, the world is just the same no matter where i go. =) Chill man... I am just a normal person, not being able to do much for you =( sorry =( Just trying my best to make you happy =) If you hate to see me, I would try my best to make sure that there is something or someone to block me from being seen by you=) cos i just want you to be happy the way you want! =) (The way you want it to be)

Let's start....
About what happen yesterday... Ha ha althought it may seems to be abit lame by what they do but it is quite fun as long as they are happy=)
Sometimes, I just hope friends can be there!
I dun realli know should I be happy or sad....
I might try to look happy with a sad heart... But is like I feel happy that i can see him being happy.... But in another words it may mean that i dun mean much to him as he is still the way he is or rather he might be even happier than being my goosd friend... When i see him talking to msn until so happy i would wonder who makes him so Happy. And he seems to be happy viewing other people's picture through friendster.

But I have no choice but to force myself to think that he is Happy especially without me... When it comes to at night... It would be worst the feeling of loneliness would be higher.
however, better than nothing at least he is talking to me now.... I mean not talk but playing with me...>.<

AM I HAPPY THE WAY I AM NOW?

The way to BBDC!!!

2007-06-23T20:25:00.000-07:00

ok man I should I should start with the day whereby i went for my Final Theory Test which is on 21st of jun... The whole class know about it as my Facilitator wish me all the best before i went off for my test....

And of course ha ha this is the cute little bus which i wish to sit and told my friend this type of bus is cute althought they are old.... And this is the bus that bring me the smooth journey to pass my test =) Thanks Man Cute Bus!!!!

And this are just some of the features in the bus... Look at the door man!!!! So unique... It open by sliding wor ha ha ha!!!!

Just Love it cos it is unique enough Just LOve the way it looks...

Somethings everything just can be appreciated... And Love the way it is.... Just like normal Human =)

And this is just one of the donut i ate at BBDC... During holidays... when i went for morning practice paper... And after i pass my FTT (final theory test...) I would focus on my practice for the driving =)

JOLene need to Jia you le!!!!! ha ha ha...

And this picture shows the pervertic julien... who acting to peep at someone's undergarment ha ha ha... Tat's lame man!!! real lame sia!!! Wth.... Cold sweat dripping -.-".

2007-06-16T08:07:00.000-07:00

Okay as per requested... i better blog today if not i sure kena beat man ha ha ha...
Haiz... Actually recently quite emo...><>
The someone seems to left... Haiz...
I am Selfish so i choose to avoid...
And furthermore i am realli very very very tired le... Haiz help!!!!i miss u!!!! But haiz...
Today the ah min hor... ha ha... Blur lol... Ha ha... Do lame thingy sia... Ha Ha Ha...
U know what people use the kid use de toilet bowl...
and when we on the way to take train she ask me...
are we going to take train ah dot...
then nvm ha ha I bought a fake sun flower to cheer her up... in the end she use it as a weapon to hit me... Evil sia... ha ha ha...
Haiz... Actually seriously saying i realli miss the last him before he change lol haiz... Just hope it can turn back... but haiz..
Dun think so...
Haiz so i have to get use to it le bah...
No matter wat luckily i still have U GUYS by my side u GUYS ROX man!!!!
I miss u all =(
I miss him! haiz...
opps scratch kor kor they all when playing basketball again... sry wor!!!
ps ar!!!!
I dunno why when i hear what that rad say!!! I realli very angry feel like killing him he realli disappoint me sia... Hate him!!!!
><
If U mean to hurt me !!! I would rather pass u a knife and u stab it would be less pain rather than wat i having now!!! THE WAY U TREAT GOOD FRIEND I GOT NOTHING TO SAY!!!><
NO MATTER WAT I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW I AM ALWAYS HERE...
AND ALL MY FRIEND OUT THERE... JOLENE IS ALWAYS HERE... MY SHOULDER IS ALWAYS AVAILABLE =) CHILL MAN!!!

I LOVE THEM!!!!!

2007-06-03T06:40:00.001-07:00

Ha Ha Ha.... guess you all noe wat's that dun need me to say ha ha ha.... That's NITE green apple flavour..... ha ha ha.... Huiyi trying to stop me from buying but can't... Sorri cos i realli very fan... cos i make someone angry... gaga.... ><><.... I dun wan him to angry with me.... Cos the things i say i dun mean it... Jolene is always saying things that she dun wana say de....><>

Ha ha... That's me and Huiyi blur face sia... Ha Ha Ha... lala... Know why no min...??? Cos she dun give me face dun wan take with me ha ha ha.... Come lets smack her ha ha ha....><>

I miss the sec sch life man!!!! I MISS THEM!!!! I miss BEL WAN AND ALL...><><><

MIN AND YI.... Thanks for being there for me all along... HAHA... although i am down u all are always there.... BTW.... I think i must really think before i say things... So that i won't hurt u all and pissed everyone off...><>

If the someone whom I made him angry happen to view my blog which i dun think he will see..... SOrry for being like that i am always saying things which i shouldn't say and dun wish to say de... ZHEN DE HEN BAO QIan!!!!!!!

MIN MIN AND YIYI!!!! THANKS FOR ACCING ME WHEN I AM DOWN AND THANKS FOR LISTENING TO ME!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!

the way it is

2007-06-01T09:22:00.000-07:00

The day...
Feeling down... If that day will come it will just arrive so why am i feeling so down?
Haiz... do i really want it to be this way?
The very moment the thought in me was just to dissapear from the scene and not seeing anything... Cos i think i just don't have the courage to face the fact... I just don't have the courage.
The day would come so i should have been prepared? or is just that i just don't want to face the truth? Am i being stupid by doing that or... I am always stupid>
Why do i always have to say the things i dun wan to say or dun mean it... whyh why why??
I sometimes just hate myself....
Do i really want it to be that way?.... DO I????
Forgive me><... I just wanna look at you...

Yo Man!

2007-05-31T04:30:00.000-07:00

Hey hey hey....
Today is a good day!!!!!! ha ha ha.... Cos i went to shop at bugis with Ma Yuan and her housemates.... ha ha ha.... Wah... saying the truth there are really too much things to shop.... If only i have alot alot alot of money... then i shop until i am staistified. I spend ard 120.... opps... over spend again... haiz use to it le...Ga ga.....
Hey hey.... also got to know new friend.... Ma Yuan's friend... ha ha ha.... Don't really know her actual name... only know i call her yaya... ha ha ha... funny cos she say can call her that... since it is a easy way to call i also don't mind gaga.... yeah yeah yeah...
Got myself 4 tops, 1 shorts, 4 pairs of earrings and a necklance. ha ha ha... Happy shopping... Actually want to get a shoe but don't have my size><>

okokok.... Now start with yesterday....
not really a smooth day.... cause.... I step into the hole of a wooden cardboard...><><>

Felt insecure at a moment, as i try to reach grab min but i miss.... cause she was walking quite fast and didn't know... I don't blame her as it was too sudden... But for that moment i felt insecure... Haiz... No one is there to protect me all the time.... Told someone but the person never replied felt really sad... As it seems that I am not being protected... Only min there to ask if i am okay... And only Ma Yuan who bother to ask if I am okay.... Actually i am quite touch by them. But found out something not everyone would be there to protect me not everyone is there to protect me....

"Will you rescue me out of the water when i am drowning? Will you be my light when it is dark? Will you take my hands when i am lost ? Will you be there if i am sad? "
" Somehow i just want to lean onto someone and think no more, although i do not want to be weak but sometime the road ahead is too steep, and i can't move on..."
"WILL YOU TAKE MY HANDS?"

JOLene

2007-05-29T06:49:00.000-07:00

Friends.
Dear buddies sorry for making you all tired all this while... Is like it is always due to my attitude and i felt really bad, I am sorry.
I felt that i have said sorry alot of time and didn't manage to change .... Felt so useless... Really hope to control my temper. Maybe the problem with me is that i always think that people so something on purpose, which they didn't mean it.
I should say myself lucky to have such good friends around me to guild me through my mistake and not giving up hope on me thanks.
BABES i really luvs YOU GUYS!!!!! THANKS FOR NOT GIVING UP HOPE ON ME><

School
Nice facilitator for science and other module.... But really touch by the faci.... I really likes her but why do she have to leave... But really wish her all the best in everything she do.... She is the one that makes me like science.... She is the one!!! That motivate me to move on and work harder to aim for better grade she is the one!!!!!! Okay i would JIA YOU!!! same to her hope she will do well no matter what she is doing really wish her all the best!!!!!

Class
Felt closer to the class... as now we tend to eat together. Although it might not be very big group but still it is consider as W15F.... rox!!!!!! :) Just love them.... And thanks to the someone who encourage me to Jia you too!!!!! I will really try my best!!!!! We rox!!!!! ha ha ha...

Module
haiz... still not doing very well... But i would really try my very best to improve:) not just for me but for the people around me who cares:) I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!

LOVE
Just want him to be happy:)